He Makes Me Sad

I watched this video just now, and it made me cry. Why? Because look at how happy Chloe and Chris are. What an amazing dad. Chloe looks so happy!

Today, T and I had another Court Date. He insisted on it. My lawyer called me on Monday to let me know. Yes, at 39 weeks, and 2 days, I went to court. He flat out told the judge, he didn't want to be Baby C's father. Whether DNA can prove it or not.

The judge has left it up to me. If I decide to put T's name on Baby C's birth certificate, he is her father. Then I'll have the option to petition for Child Support and such. Or I can allow T to sign over all Parental Rights. If I do that, his name won't go on Baby C's birth certificate. I can't ever ask for anything from him. Which is more than OK with me. It honestly is. But the judge will not hear any of my decisions unit after Baby C is born.

Here I am, 2 days from my due date. We should be so happy! T and I should be sitting in our home, planning on our Baby Girl's birth. Just thinking about the rest of our lives. Instead, we're in Court. Fighting about whether or not T is going to be held responsible, in the eyes of the Court, as Baby C's father.

It makes me really sad. Because T and I always talked about, what it was like growing up in a "Broken Home." And how we wanted to be married forever. To give our kids a better life. Now look at us. We can't even figure out which way is up.

I wanted so badly to work this out between T and I. And when I realized that there was nothing left to fight for, I at least wanted our baby to have a good relationship with T. But T wants nothing of it. I should be grateful that he decided this before Baby C's birth. Before she grows dependent on her dad.

But it still hurts. It hurts that he left me. Left me for not only 1 other woman, but 2. Who knows, there are probably more. And that he lied to me. Lied about his Baby Girl, M. Both of these innocent babies, deserve a better father.

More than anything, it hurts me that my Baby Girl will never have a relationship with her daddy. She will never have the chance to know the loving side of him. The side that loves, comforts, and protects. It pains me that there will never be love shared between the 2 of them. But that is T's decision. Not mine. And one day, he'll have to explain that to our daughter. XOXO

Don't Cheat in Our Hometown

This song, it sums up the way I feel about my hubby's actions. I'm shocked. Sad. Mad. Everything. Why? I guess there are some things I will never really understand. Like him telling me that we were going to work through all of our problems. Then I find out he's been seeing not 1, but 2 different women. Well, that I know of. Nothing would surprise me at this point. Let's just be that honest. I guess, this is just the end. The end to our story as a couple. But not to our story together. That is still being written... XOXO

Happy Valentine's Day T!!!

T,

I know that we've had a rough few months. But I LOVE YOU! You're still the love of my life. The ONLY man that I want in my life. :)

I really do hope that you have an amazing day! I know that you have to work. We're both going to be working. But I want you to enjoy this day as much as possible. I want you to know how much I love you. And that I'll always be here for you. I'm your wife. Forever. And I know we can work through all of this. We can find our way back to each other. And we can be just as happy as we were a year ago.

I wish that I could make you some amazing meal. That I had gotten to wake up in your arms. But that's just not were we are right now. But I do want to see you. I want to have dinner with you. I want to share in your life. I want us to have a life together again. I LOVE YOU HUBBY!!!

XOXO Your Wifey

Happy Birthday Hubby!!!

Happy Birthday T!!!

Today is my hubby's birthday. And I know that the last few months haven't been the best. We've struggled. We've fought. We've separated. But through it all, one thing has never changed, just how much I love him. :)

I know with lots of hard work, we can be back to where we were. But just know that I love you with all of my heart. Know that there is still nothing in the world that I wouldn't do for you. I'm looking forward to tonight. And taking you out for a fun night. It's about time that we just hangout and just enjoy each other. And of course, to celebrate you and your birthday!

This is such a special day. It's a big day for my hubby. An important birthday. And just a special day to celebrate the man that I love. He's amazing. Completely amazing. And I love him so much! I hope I can make this a good birthday for him. XOXO

Goin' Through the Big D

This song always reminded me of my mom. My parents had already gotten divorced by the time this song came out. But this song, it always reminds me of my mom. I don't know why. It just does. Go figure that I'm in this situation. Isn't life just weird? XOXO

Good News

I got some really good news tonight. It was totally unexpected. But I'm so excited about it! Doesn't the saying go something like, "All good things in life, come as a surprise."

Well, I'm surprised. And so excited! You'll just have to come back later in the week to find out what it's all about. Until then, I'm going to head to bed. Sweet dreams! XOXO

This is the Life!

T and I are sitting on the beach. Enjoying the sun, sand, and the water. I feel like we could be on a desert island. It's just perfect out here! It feels like the only "real" communication should be done with a letter in a bottle. :)

We're just enjoying it all. Including each other's company. It feels like a "Mini Honeymoon." And I'm definitely loving it! A nice little trip, in the middle of all of our crazy traveling. I know T is really enjoying it. And so am I! I just love being married to this man! And being Mrs. M! XOXO

Dreaming of Sun and Sand

Well, we made it to sunny Florida! Tomorrow morning, I want nothing more than to lay out on the beach. I wonder if I can find a hammock. That would be nice.

T and I are here for just a couple of days. Literally, just a couple of days. T has to be back at work on the 2nd, and I'll be flying home then. But we thought we'd come spend a couple of days together and alone. :) XOXO

Southern Spoon Bread

We live in the south. Neither T or I are originally from here. He's from up north. I'm from the southwest. But this is where we live. And where we'll live during his entire career. And I'm more than OK with that. I moved here as a teen. I fought it then. But I love it now.

But one of the things about living in the south, everyone wants you to be able to cook. And cook the classic southern dishes. So I'm trying. Again, thanks to Betty, I found a good recipe for Southern Spoon Bread. Now, let's just see if I can make it. :) XOXO

Candles

Candles. I've never really been all into them. On occasion, I'd buy 1 at Wal-Mart. You know the ones. They have a cheesy smell. And I would put them in the bathroom. Something nice to liven up the room.

But I've never really been into them. Until my bestie came to our home. She was adding some little touches here and there. Putting up pictures, adding accessories, and...candles. Not a whole mess of them. She has a bunch of candles around her house. But they look amazing! Because she has them mixed in with all the other stuff in her house. On bookshelves, on table tops, in little nooks. It really looks amazing.

So when she started to put them around our house, I was getting a little nervous. But late last night, when we got home, T started to light them. And all these candles just made this beautiful light! Glowing. It was so beautiful. And there was no horrible smell. Just a light fragrance in the air.

I'm not sure where she got them. Or what kind of candle they are. But they really are amazing! I will definitely be lightening them more often. And just enjoying the magical light they give off. T really enjoyed them as well. I'm telling you, we experienced something completely new and different. Now I just need to know where my bestie got these amazing candles from. XOXO

Sharing a Bit

I figured I'd share a few things about our home with you. To begin with, my hubby picked the paint color. It's a dark brown. And it reminds me of chocolate. Every time I walk into our bedroom, I get a sudden craving for chocolate. But it's beautiful!

We picked out the furniture together. Which was a task people! It took forever. I picked the style and he picked the finish. I couldn't find a picture of our furniture. And I still have no clue where our camera is. But the furniture has a "bit of a modern feel." At least that's how my bestie described it. But it's not really hard and harsh. It has some feminine touches too. So my hubby chose a black finish. And I have to say, it looks really nice.

So that left me with the decision about the bedding. I didn't want anything too girly. Or too manly. But I knew it had to be dark. I've learned that much about living with a man. I've always had blue and white bedding. But this time around, I was looking for something darker.

The picture above is what I chose. It looks kinda grey in the picture. But really, it's a blue color. And we also bought some dark brown pillows. It looks really nice. The blueish grey bedding and curtains, against the dark brown walls is so pretty! Especially with the black furniture. I'm really loving it! It's the perfect mix of feminine and masculine. XOXO

Thank You Notes

Is it bad, that I just dropped off all of our "Thank You" cards, at the post office? I feel bad! It's been over 2 months since we got married. And almost 3 months since the girls had that girly day/party for me in CA.

But life has been a bit crazy. I hope our friends know how much we appreciate what they've done for us. And that we really are enjoying our gifts. It just took a while to get all those cards written out. I really wanted to Thank everyone individually. To send them a special note and a picture of T and I.

Did I take too long? I hope not. But a wedding, T's work schedule, our little trips, and moving...well I think I did a good job of getting them out this quick. Because honestly, we still haven't unpacked lots of our gifts. Heck, lots of our stuff is still in boxes...now I need to go pack for this weekend. XOXO

Whatta Man

I was like 9 when this song came out. My bestie would sing it all the time! And I thought she was so cool. When we got older and she had a boyfriend, she would joke around with him. She would sing part of the lyrics to him. Totally embarrass him. But every time they heard this song, they'd dance to it. Enzo used to laugh about it. And he thought she was hilarious. They were such a cute couple!

Me? I always wanted to find a man that would fit this song. I wanted a good man. A good man that loved me. A good family man. But a man. You know, that would take care of me. In every way. Someone that would tell me that he loved me. That would take the time to get to know me. Well, T is that man and so much more!

We were just hanging out the other night. And looking up old music on YouTube. I found this song, and it perfectly fits my hubby! T is everything I could have dreamt up. Yup!

I've finally got my mighty good man. And I'm loving every second of him! We are so in love. In every way, your typical Newlyweds. We're loving all of that too! This might just become my man's new song. :) XOXO

Bubble and Brown...and Happy Cinco de Mayo

We got these for a wedding present. They're the Rachael Ray "Bubble and Brown" set. I wasn't sure what I was going to use them for. But like I said before, we finally getting settled in our new house. And things are finding a home. Which means, I'm trying all sorts of new things out.

So I decided to try my hand at enchiladas today. I called my bestie and she gave me a list of food to buy. Then she walked me through the process. I LOVE her so much! She is so patient and helpful. :)

By the time T got home, I had the enchilada casserole in the oven. I even made some rice. T made us some guacamole. And we had dinner. It was so good! And this "Bubble and Brown" was so good to bake our dinner in! It made everything so crunchy and yummy. I'm definitely going to be using this a lot more. Because it was so easy to use, made our food dinner, and was super easy to clean up!

If you don't have one of these, I think you should go out and buy one. Because they are incredible! And you can fit so much food in them! It's a bit ridiculous. But you could easily make a big casserole and invite 8-10 people over. :) This is a great piece! Oh, and Happy Cinco de Mayo! That was my inspiration for dinner tonight. :) XOXO

Compromise and Brownies

So I'm no big cook or baker. But even I can manage to make some brownies from time to time. Mostly because T and I really like them. And I can buy the mix and you only add oil and nuts! Easy peasy!

But both T and I only like the edge pieces. They're more crispy. Just taste better. Yes, the edge pieces just taste better! And we generally don't eat the middle. I know that's ridiculous. But we have enough friends that come around here. So they usually eat the middle part. And in a pinch, well the gooey brownies are good with vanilla ice cream and some chocolate sauce. :)

And after finally unpacking some more of our wedding presents, I found this little beauty! She makes all the brownies with crispy edges. Yummy! Now T and I don't have to fight over the edge brownies. We can eat the entire pan! I'm not sure if that's good or bad. But I made brownies tonight. And they were so yummy! Thanks to our amazing friends who gave us this perfect brownie pan. It's literally changed our lives! XOXO

Where Can I Buy This?

I was doing a search on google for something. I don't even now what. And this picture popped up! I'm in love with this mirror and those vases! I've already found the vases online. But I can't find this mirror anywhere. Does anyone know where I can find it? I have the perfect place in our house for it too! XOXO

Searching for Mirrors

I don't think I've mentioned it, but T and I moved into our house. The big house. And for a few weeks, it was really kinda of funny. We just moved our clothes and personal items. We had a bedroom set. And that was it. But we travel all the time, so it wasn't that bad. Because we're gone at least 4 days a week!

But my bestie came to our rescue. And she's been helping me get T and I's house in order. She took me shopping for furniture one day. T didn't really care what we bought or how much I spent. He just wanted some comfy furniture. It took us about 2 weeks to order and buy all our furniture. But it was so nice when things started arriving.

We've gotten to the point of actually decorating the house. You know, when the house becomes more of a home. And this is the fun stuff. I send links to my bestie. And she just kind of makes all these great decisions. Everything that she brings is so T and me!

But there are things that she wants us to do. Like pick more of our style. Then she can narrow down the decisions for us. This leads us to mirrors. They're important. At least that's what she tells me. So here we go...



Do we want to go more traditional? You know, with a clean look...clean lines and expected colors. Nothing too out of the ordinary.



Or more funky? Fun shapes, colors and styles. I'm thinking more funky. But maybe a funky design in a more neutral color.

What do you think? We have furniture that has clean lines. But everything that we've added to the house is fun and funky. It makes the rooms feel comfortable. Like all the over sized pillow and blankets in the den. And the fun vases and stuff on the bookshelves. XOXO

Crock Pot Turkey

I never thought of this before. A crock pot? I thought that was only for grandmas. Or keeping nacho cheese warm. But I might just have to crack mine out of the box. Yes, lots of our wedding presents are still in the boxes. I'm a little embarrassed to admit. But it's true. :)

But turkey in the crock pot. Betty is like a genius! She should have a blog too! So I could read about her recipes. But I really enjoy her videos. I just might have to try this one out. I'm feeling a little domestic here. Married life is wonderful! XOXO

Happy Easter

Happy Easter everyone! I'm really excited about today. T and I are going to cook us a little dinner. And later, we're going to meet some friends. To help them hide eggs for the little ones. Should be a fun day. And it's definitely been nice to have a Sunday off. It doesn't happen most. But I definitely enjoyed sleeping in today! Hope everyone has a great day with their family and friends. :) XOXO

Homemade Chicken Soup

I know. It's hard to believe I'd try cooking again. And chicken. Especially this close to our near brush with death! But I really wanted some homemade soup. No, I'm not joking. This is not an April Fool's Day joke. I just wanted some soup.

I found this recipe. And it looked both easy and quick. Oh, and how can you really screw up soup? So I went to the grocery store this morning. And I bought everything I needed to make this soup. I also watched this video like 5 times!

And I came home and put everything together. It smells good. And there is plenty of time for it to cook. I mean completely cook! So let's all cross our fingers. And hope that it comes out yummy. It also looks pretty healthy! XOXO